Baby #2!

Well, I've been pretty MIA lately, but for a good reason. I'm pregnant! And sick as can be. But so so grateful. Here's my story:

We wanted the babes to be fairly close together in age, so around Ellery's birthday in October, we decided to stop preventing having another. Come March and no sign of baby, we decided to try a little harder and use ovulation tests. In the end, it took me nine months to get pregnant with this one (it took six months with Ellery). Nine months is nothing in an eternal perspective, and of course, other people have it a lot worse than that, but I'm not going to say it was easy. The majority of my close friends were pregnant and I wasn't, and that was kind of hard on me. The whole process is such a roller coaster (trying to get pregnant, being pregnant, having a baby…). Thankfully, Heavenly Father watches out for us and He seemed to send me pretty frequent reminders that He has a plan for our family, He knows what's best for us, He loves us, He hears our prayers, and that everything is okay, not to worry, and to focus on the good.

When I didn't have a period in July, I took a pregnancy test. It was negative, and I wasn't surprised because my periods have always been irregular. At the beginning of August I went to the doctors for a regular check up and to ask a few questions about trying to get pregnant. She did a pregnancy test (urine sample), and it was negative. But they also did some blood work, and told me they would call me in a few days with the results. A few days later they called me, and to my surprise, they informed me that I AM pregnant after all! They guessed I was probably only one or two weeks pregnant (turns out I was three though).

Today I had an ultrasound to find out how far along I am (since they couldn't really go by my cycle because it's always been irregular). I am eight weeks and six days! My due date is April 17th. Baby looks like a baby and has a great heartbeat. It was pretty amazing to see, and I loved having Ellery there with me to show her the baby. (so turns out when I took my pregnancy test back in July I was actually a few days pregnant, but it was negative anyway).

Well, onto the reason why I've been slacking so much on pretty much everything that's not completely required of me…I've been so sick. I started feeling really sick at six weeks. There was a week where I wasn't able to get anti nausea medicine, so I threw up three to four times a day, hardly ate anything besides saltines, and literally laid in bed or on the couch the entire day every day. Fortunately, since getting the anti nausea medication, I've only thrown up once, and I'm a bit more functional. But NOTHING like my normal self. I feel sick the majority of the time, and there are a few times almost every day that I come VERY close to throwing up, yet somehow manage to keep it down. I'm taking my medication every 6-8 hours (that's as frequent as I'm allowed to), and I'm extremely careful about not getting too full or too hungry, lying down a lot, getting enough rest, and being careful about what I eat. I also have this yucky, disgusted feeling almost 100% of the time. NOTHING sounds appealing to me. I pretty much despise food these days (SO unlike my non-pregnant self). I basically can't touch the dishes or the trash without feeling like I'm going to throw up, and I hold my breath every time I open the fridge or the panty. Clay does all the cooking or else we eat gross processed foods like Totinos frozen pizzas.

Clay has been SO helpful and wonderful. I couldn't do it without him. And fortunately he is not AS busy as I thought he was going to be (although he is pretty busy!). But he comes home from school and takes over immediately with Ellery and the dishes and everything else that needs to be done. Ellery was TOTALLY a mama's girl until I got sick. Now she's ALL about Daddy. She asks for him all day long, and you've never seen someone so happy as she is when he comes home. My goodness she loves him. (I don't blame her for picking him as a favorite these days!).

Timing is such an interesting thing. If I had gotten pregnant as soon as we started trying, we would have had a baby in July, right before our move. And in my limited knowledge, that seems like much better timing than how it worked out. I would have had close friends and neighbors surrounding me, loving me and supporting me and helping with Ellery and everything through all the trials of pregnancy and having a baby. And then we'd move here and explore this new place with baby in our family. BUT like I said, Heavenly Father knows what's best for our family. And I don't understand it yet, but I do trust Him. So although it's really difficult to be in a whole new place, not knowing anyone, and being sick as can be, this is what's best. Maybe I just need this trial. And I'll figure it out one day. P.S. at least being sick is a GOOD sign. And focusing on the good, I am grateful to have nine extra months with Ellery as my baby. Although I do feel like she's ready to be a big sister, she'll be even more ready by the time baby comes.

Anyway, so far this pregnancy actually is slightly better than my last. With Ellery, I still threw up a bit, even with the medicine, and it lasted all nine months. I'm hoping since I'm not actually throwing up much anymore, that maybe I'll get better eventually before I have the baby. One can always hope. And, I must mention that although I don't really know anyone here yet, I have had a lot of people reach out to me and be extremely welcoming and offer to help. In our church, we have something called Visiting Teachers. Basically, everyone is assigned two people to watch over them, befriend them, and help them in any way they can (we help more than just the people we visit teach, but this just ensures that everyone is being looked out for). It's a pretty amazing program. Although I don't really know my new visiting teachers well yet, they've already made me feel loved and welcomed, and I feel like I already have a few people I can call if I need help with something. Also, my friends back in Dallas, and even my girlies in Utah, and of course my family, have all been extremely supportive, which helps a ton. My sweet mama calls me every day to check up on me, and it makes the world of a difference. Being sick can really weigh on you emotionally, but I actually feel like I've been a little better emotionally this time around as well. I think it helps that I have sweet Ellery to make me smile all day every day. How I love that girl. When I was pregnant with her, I wished that I could just fast forward time until I felt better, or until she came. I honestly did not want to live in those moments. But now, even with the way I feel, I wouldn't give this time up. I could never fast forward because I would never want to miss Ellery at this time. Having babies is no cake walk. Being a mother is far from easy, but it's also the most sacred, wonderful, beautiful role one could have. It's the best thing there is. I'm convinced.